my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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