I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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