this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
