sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
