just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
