Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
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until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
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I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.