North Korea, Best Korea!
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize