When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
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Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
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It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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