If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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