is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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