They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize