We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Where is the hickey?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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