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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!

  Fav 24 4506 1247

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?

  Fav 31 7918 925

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• (831): View more from California

  Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?

  Fav 37 7060 1581

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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party

  Fav 17 5309 2009

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?

  Fav 22 5422 1787

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.

  Fav 25 6109 1409

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.

  Fav 3 1774 2222

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• (626): View more from California

  I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner

  Fav 4 4213 1152

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.

  Fav 8 2105 1539

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom

  Fav 2 814 502

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?

  Fav 5 591 334

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