It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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