my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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