Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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