We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
