i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
