Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bit a glass in half.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize