I think I died a long time ago.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
