so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
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It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
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Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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