So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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