We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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