I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Randomize