just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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