do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
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