Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
