The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize