I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
