So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
barbara walters just said penis...
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
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Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
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Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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