He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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