so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
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Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
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There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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