it wasn't lemon gatorade
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.