absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
