Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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