Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
