I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
