i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize