There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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