He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
