yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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