I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize