Umm I'm too high to move.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
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