I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
its not stalking. its research.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
But theres a keg here and me gusta
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Randomize
