So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
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It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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