K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
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