thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
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So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
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i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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