i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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