i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
