like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
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I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
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It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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